Sunday, March 28, 2010

Interview with Thaddeus Romans - Fictitious Expert on Vampires

Neil Benson: I'm privileged to have the opportunity to interview

Thaddeus Romans, one of the most widely recognized experts on vampires.

Mr. Romans served as an advisor for my vampire novel, Unholy Embrace.

Thaddeus Romans: I'm pleased to be here. It was a pleasure working with you on your novel.

Neil Benson: Mr. Romans, many people are curious as to how you obtained your expertise. Where did you go to university?

Thaddeus Romans: University? Who said I went to a university? Don't be preposterous. I learned about vampires by studying them throughout Europe and America. In the course of my travels I became acquainted with many vampires and humans they associated with. This was how I became an expert.

Neil Benson: Were there any books that were influential in helping you formulate your theories?Thaddeus Romans: Books? I don't read books, I write them. With all the interest in vampires, I have made some good money writing about these creatures.

Neil Benson: Surely you must have read some books about vampires.

Thaddeus Romans: Well a few. I read Dracula, by Bram Stoker, and Carmela by Sheridan le Fanu. The rest of the novels are a bunch of silliness.Neil Benson: What nonfiction books have you read? None. None were worth reading. That is why I did my research. I was the only one to go out in the field.

Neil Benson: Dr. Kathryn Ramsland has gone out into the field and conducted extensive research.

Thaddeus Romans: But she never claimed to have met a real vampire. All of her time was spent talking with a vampire wannabes. A bunch of mishugina people.

Neil Benson: How do you respond to people who say vampires don't exist.Thaddeus Romans: I invite them to spend a few evenings with me and meet some real vampires. That will end any doubt on their parts.

Neil Benson: Well, Mr. Romans, it's been a pleasure talking with you.Thaddeus Romans: I'm sure it has.

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